In 2015, I packed up my life in Austin, Texas and moved to Madrid. I used to be 35 and it wasn’t my first try. I had spent greater than a decade dreaming, attempting, and failing to make Spain residence.
Since then, I’ve constructed a life in Spain and created She Hit Refresh, the place I’ve helped hundreds of different girls move overseas.
Along the way in which, I’ve skilled moments when my life in Europe felt like a film. Like the time I stumbled upon a flamenco dancer in a hidden sq., sipped wine at a Parisian café whereas the world handed by, or rode a Vespa previous the Colosseum in Rome.
But these moments aren’t on a regular basis life, and never all the things about shifting overseas is simply as you think about it to be. Here are the six myths I hear most frequently about relocating.
1. ‘It’s so low-cost’
Many international locations can really feel extra reasonably priced than the U.S., however dwelling overseas might be not as low-cost as you assume. Costs are rising all over the world, particularly housing costs. House prices in the EU went up 57.9% between 2010 and the primary quarter of 2025, whereas rents elevated by 27.8%.
My recommendation: Run the numbers based mostly on right this moment’s actuality, not outdated weblog posts. And bear in mind, what feels reasonably priced to you on a U.S. wage should be unaffordable for locals. Don’t overpay. It solely fuels the issue.
2. ‘Americans aren’t welcome’
The actual stress comes from tourism, not the comparatively small quantity of Americans shifting overseas. And whereas anti-tourism sentiment exists in crowded cities, it is probably not about Americans, and even expats in any respect. The larger difficulty is reasonably priced housing — or, as I discussed, the dearth of it.
But smaller cities throughout Europe need new residents because of depopulation. If you are critical about integrating, think about wanting past hotspots like Lisbon, Barcelona, or Amsterdam.
Regardless, in my very own expertise, once you be taught the language, contribute, and join, you will normally be welcomed with open arms.
3. ‘You’ll be lonely’
Of course you will miss household and buddies, however group overseas typically types sooner than you’d anticipate.
Other Americans and English-speaking foreigners are keen to attach. Between meetups, language exchanges, and expat occasions, you will don’t have any scarcity of alternatives to fulfill individuals.
That mentioned, deep friendships take time. I’m an extrovert, and it nonetheless took me round 2.5 years to really feel like I had a robust group in Madrid. Many of my closest friendships got here from internet hosting my very own meetups.
For deeper integration, friendships with locals are key, although these are undoubtedly more durable to kind. Many locals have already got tight circles, and breaking in takes endurance and persistence. Learning the language is crucial, and it takes time. Most persons are nonetheless inexperienced persons after a yr.
4. ‘Life overseas is ideal’
Living overseas can completely enhance your high quality of life — whether or not it is a slower tempo, a comparatively decrease price of dwelling, or simpler journey, there’s quite a bit to like. But it is not a fairy story.
You’ll nonetheless take care of forms, taxes, and logistics like discovering an condo, organising financial institution accounts, and making appointments with docs. And typically the grocery retailer will simply be closed on a Sunday once you want it most.
The hardest challenges are sometimes private. I’ll always remember after I acquired the decision that my father had handed away. It was in 2009, throughout one of my earlier stints in Spain, getting my grasp’s diploma. I realized then that the highs and lows of life nonetheless occur overseas, and the lows are more durable once you’re removed from residence.
5. ‘Where you begin is the place you need to keep’
Your first move overseas would not need to be your ceaselessly residence. Think of it as a place to begin, not a lifelong dedication. As somebody as soon as informed me: It’s a move, not a wedding.
When I moved to Madrid in 2015, I believed I’d by no means depart. But in 2020, I moved to Málaga, and now I’m contemplating heading again to Madrid once more.
I’ve seen this with others, too. Cindy Sheahan, for instance, moved to Porto, Portugal, however then determined Italy was a greater match and relocated there a yr later.
Giving your self permission to pivot may help you avoid getting stuck in research paralysis, attempting to make the “perfect” selection earlier than you even begin. There are lots of stuff you simply will not know till you have really moved.
6. ‘It’s too late for me’
I used to be 35 after I moved and thought I used to be already too previous. At the time, I solely knew of college students and retirees moving abroad, not individuals within the center of their careers. But at 45, I can say with out hesitation that it was the very best choice I’ve ever made.
And as soon as I acquired right here, I met so many individuals my age and older who had executed the identical. People make the leap at all ages — 30s, 40s, 50s, even 70s.
In truth, shifting in your 30s or later has benefits, since individuals are likely to arrive with extra monetary stability, higher self-awareness, and the knowledge to navigate challenges with perspective.
Cepee Tabibian is the founder of She Hit Refresh, a group and useful resource platform that helps girls aged 30+ move overseas. She’s the creator of “I’m Outta Here! An American’s Ultimate Visa Guide to Living in Europe” and host of the She Hit Refresh podcast. As the daughter of Colombian and Iranian immigrants, Cepee grew up in Houston, Texas, earlier than turning into an immigrant herself in Spain. For ideas and actual speak on the best way to move overseas, comply with her @shehitrefresh
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